Bade Adieu

Yesterday was my last working day in the organization that I was working for the past two and half years. What started as a normal day turned out to be a surprising day.Yes.To my utter surprise,I was inundated with gifts by my project managers,reporting managers and fellow colleagues.

Many people from various sources, viz.skype, gtalk, mails and phone were asking me whether it was my last day and wishing me good luck.It was out of the blue.I never thought that so many of them came to know or remember that it was my last day.I am truly honored. One common question that everyone asked was how do you feel? And my answer was I neither feel good nor bad. I am nuetral. I don't feel good because I am leaving an organization that I was part of for the past two and half of years. I will no longer meet my friends and other supportive colleagues.I will miss my van journey, my van mates and the chat and fun etc On the other hand, I don't feel bad because I am moving forward. I have taken a decision that will further my career goals.

A GIFT to MYSELF ON MY BIRTHDAY

I never celebrate my birthdays. My attitude towards my birthday (or birth itself) is “why on the earth I am born?” (I don’t want to sound philosophical here). Moreover, my birthday falls during vacation, so I never had the opportunity to distribute sweets to my friends and classmates when I was in school and college. Of course, on home front, my mom would make payassam (a traditional sweet) and gift me a new dress. Even my friends would give me gifts and cards and demand for treats. This has been my birthday celebration over the years. I would simply wear the new dress, receive gifts, give treats and respond to the wishes. What do you wonder? This is how even you’ll celebrate your birthday. The difference is I have never shown enthusiasm to my birthday celebrations. In reality, that day doesn’t mean much to me. It’s another passing day of the year.

But, of late, I have realized that the happiness should start from within. “I” should celebrate my birthday in the first place. So I have decided to have a gala time with myself on this birthday. I want to gift myself all the things that I like on that day. I want to gift myself all that I have denied (myself) on my birthdays so far’( don’t be impolite by asking how many birthdays so far?). Why is it that no greeting card shop sells a greeting card for wishing oneself? We have greeting cards for wishing everyone on every occasion but not oneself. Sounds funny? If you can find a greeting card to wish your mom’s distant aunt’s granny for congratulating her on making nice ladoos, why not a greeting card to wish oneself ? So if not a greeting card, I am planning to get at least some gifts for myself on that day. Not expensive gifts, just a few simple gifts that can bring an avalanche of happiness to me. They are:

• The gratitude book from “The Secret” collection by Rhonda Byrne (yes. this is a bit expensive)
• A business notebook with perforated sheets
• A nice DVD.

Beyond all these, I have a precious gift for myself. That is a “new me”. Yes. A better version of myself. A “me” with a positive outlook, enthusiasm and better control over my life. A priceless gift for the lifetime indeed!

Ten Things that Make Me Happy in a Jiffy

At times, I feel blue like any other human being.Given the fact that I can be a very sensitive person, in particular, in my personal life (we can't be that way in our professional life), I will turn negative often(of course, sensitivity is a negative trait). During such downbeat moments, a few things can make me happy instantly.

1. A hilarious or thrilling movie( basically, any movie with an acceptable storyline)
   
2. A nice magazine or book
   
3. Writing or blogging
4. Alpha meditation
   
5. Shopping, movie or outing with friends or family
   
6. Walking in a park listening to music
7. Seeing family photographs
8. Eating potatoes
9. Listening to music
10. Singing

Enterprenuership Dreams

I have read many articles, interviews and stories on women entrepreneurs those who have made it to the top. Many such women have really inspired me and instilled a desire to start my own business.But I don't want to sail in uncharted waters. I am aware of the fact that I should gain sufficient experience and learn the nitty-gritties of the industry in the first place.Though it is too premature to tell the world that I want to go on my own, it is my dream. It's time for me to develop the qualities that are required for an enterprenuer.

But I have already got some hands-on experience on enterprenuership in my college. When I was in my undergraduation, I was part of the bazaar organized by my college. I hired a stall to sell the multi-level marketing products distributed by my parents.I employed innovative techniques to attract the crowd to my stall(there were more than hundred stalls). I distributed hand-outs listing the products that are avaialble in my stall.I also announced free gifts with every purchase. But as a twist of the fate, few onlookers adviced that I should not display MLM products in stalls.Consequently, I had to hide all the products from the display and show them only when visitors approach my stall.Though my first enterprenuership attempt was a big flop show,I still take it to my stride because I atleast made some attempt to attract visiters to my shop.Moreover, I neither gained nor lost anything. I sold the visitor passes to meet out the shop expenses. So I did not spend a paise form my pocket.But I gained hands-on lessons for my future enterpreneurship venture.

Hope I did not digress by recounting my enterprenuership exposure. Coming back to my enterprenuership desire. If I have to start a business, I should only capitalize on my writing skills.There are already many home-based businessmen those who freelance for writing projects. May be I should follow suit in the future and then build my own business. Lemme see what future has in store for me??

Packed Weekends and Lazy Weekdays!

This weekend, I was committed to every event that came my way .Consequently, my weekend was packed with activities.My uncle and aunt had come down from Salem. So my cousin brother had decided that we should have a gala time and booked tickets for Saroja (a happening Tamil movie) for the Friday night show. We went as a team of nine people.What's more ? We had fun as if there is no tomorrow. On Saturday, after making up for the lost sleep on the previous night, I went for shopping with my aunt and mom. One good point is I didn't blow much of the money but still made few purchases.On Sunday morning, I went with my friend for Saroja again (what to do this was booked a week ahead).We finished our outing with the lunch.It was an early morning show, so I woke up early.I very badly wanted to hit the bed but in vain. After lazing around for sometime, out of the blue ,I realized that I had to make it for a collegue's wedding reception in the evening. I had no energy to commute all the way to the marriage hall.After dilly-dallying for sometime, atlast, I had decided to show up for the wedding reception. When I returned from the reception, I was over worked and flopped in the bed without further wasting time.My weekends have crunched schedules than my weekdays indeed!!

Teachers those who inspired Me!

Though we have well past the teacher's day,I feel its still time for me to reminisce about teachers those who are a reason for what I am now. I have always been fascinated about my English teachers throughout my tenure in school and college. This is one reason why I like English even today. The first English teacher who instilled an interest for English in me was Bama miss.She is my fourth standard English teacher. I remember her only vaguely.But still her cute pony tail and her decent look and accent fails to leave my memory.Then, my sixth standard English teacher, Rajeswari. She was civility personified.I still remember the poetry that she taught us first "I know a face a lovely face, the face is full of ... and grace".She had a gentle voice which gone well with her slim frame. I really doubt whether any other teacher can be so kind towards her students like her.

The next person who made an impact in me is Jalaja teacher. She was teaching social science for us in the same sixth standard.She used to go that extra mile while teaching. She was very committed to her profession.Moreover, she had an enterprising personality.She used to mingle well with students.She was also the class teacher for us in the seventh standard. The class teachers usually handled only English.We all protested and made another teacher to step down as social science teacher and made her to handle both social science and English.

Once we had a lesson on Walt Disney in English. Jalaja teacher inspired and guided us to create a miniature of Disney land in our classroom. We invited other teachers to see our work.Not to mention,we gained laurels from all. The best part of Jalaja teacher's English sessions are she used to conceive tunes for poems and make us sing poems in her tunes, which was a major hit among students. Even today I remember the poems that she taught for their unique tunes. While handling social science, Jalaja miss had the knack of captivating the students.Her never waning enthusiasm would inspire any student. In the middle of the lessons, she used to shout "take down the additional questions", the students would enthusiastically follow her instructions.She also created a healthy competition among students of different sections.Another classic example of her uniqueness and commitment is she used to take special classes everyday in the evenings for one hour.But the downside of her personality is favoritism.

After Jalaja teacher, I had an English teacher in my eleventh standard. Her name is Sarala. Again she inspired me for her great accent and presentable appearance.Her sessions on Shakespeare, in particular, "All world's a stage" is unforgettable. To my surprise, she continued to be the English teacher for my twelfth standard also.

In college, I had Radha mam in my first year of under graduation.She also handled few subjects in the second and third years. Initially, she was very close with students but later many students didn't like her for whatsoever reasons.But I cannot deny that she made an impact in me for her interactive sessions which turned out to be productive many a times.Next to her, my English lecturer Parvez Dhara Boat(hope I got the spelling right) inspired students through her efficacious sessions.Later, in my post graduation, Vijayanti Krishnaswamy, my journalism lecturer was a source of inspiration .She is a journalist turned lecturer, who had immense interest in teaching journalism.Her lecture notes were more than enough for students to score in the exams.While talking about teachers those who inspired me,I cannot leave Dr.Padmaja. She was the visiting lecturer in the institute in which I was pursuing a technical writing course. Her enthusiasm, in depth knowledge in the subject, and employing innovative techniques in teaching made her to stand apart.

Friendship at Work-Nuggets of my Experience!

I earned some of the best friends in my work life. I have few close college pals with whom I spend every alternative weekend till today.However,out of many friends in school and college, I am still close with only few.The reason may be I was not a very outspoken or neighborly kind of person till my college. I was plagued by the fear of rejection and suffering from over dose of poor self-esteem.It was only when I debouched from my school and college life to the corporate world, my personality underwent a sea change.My performance in my very first job and the name that I earned among employees boosted my self-esteem.Consequently, I could come out of the shell and mingle with others easily. As a result, I had(have) many close pals in my previous office.Due to our varying wavelengths, the girls at office were in two different groups.Some of them, who were very homely and traditional formed a group.The rest of us, who were quite forward in our thinking formed another group. I cannot forget the days when we used to chat loudly in the pantry with a cup of tea/coffee in our hands. I really miss those chat sessions ( and of course, that delicious tea from the vending machine) that we had during our break time.

We used to experience power-cuts very often in my previous office. They didn't have a generator for whatsoever reasons. So we cannot work during those black-out days.However, even then, we (girls) were not suppose to go out and expected to remain inside the office premises. This was the general opinion of the management and other employees. But we felt that unsaid rule was really kiddish and oppressive.We started going out like other (men) employees and gave a damn about the dirty glances that was exchanged by the rest of the employees.Had we committed any felony for these men (and some women) to make a hue and cry out of it? We used to visit the nearby shops and would get snacks to kill the rest of the time. We used to go out for lunch once in a while and stay in office after working hours in case of pending assignments ( as if it is a big achievement). Sooner or later, we became trend setters.

We were bold and outspoken.On the other hand, we were also sincere and hardworking.So everyone accepted us for what we were.What I shared with you all is just a tip of an iceberg.We had far more pleasant moments and also fights and disagreements.Not to mention,we were also supportive to each other and extended helping hand during difficult times.A friend in need is a friend indeed!What's more? This is not only a story of friendship but also a description of how a relatively reserved girl turned out to be a chatter box!!So folks out there! If you think that college life is the end of your joyful or gala time with your friends, change your opinion! In fact, I have my best time with my college friends itself only after becoming a working professional!

Self Scanning

As I go through a lean phase at office, I have some time to catch up with blogging. So, I thought I can do a self-scanning of myself.Let me try to list my pluses and minuses through this post(pardon me for writing a personal post that is not worth a read for others, but I thought a person who visit my blog should get some idea about me). Ok, at first, let me list my pluses.

Pluses

1. I have a good sense of humor
2. I am approachable and affable (of course, I'll say sorry to people those who try to misuse me)
   
3. If I determine and focus on something, I will never give back (of course, determining and focusing happens hardly)
4. Similarly, if I have to do or prove something, I will do it at any cost.I have that will power.
   
5. If I like a work or an activity, I can spend even 24 hours in that(there are instances of people pulling me when I was glued to the monitor at work, I was called as miss. sincere in my first job)
   
6. I am very sensitive (I can't pass criticism as mere comments.Instead, I'll really take it up as challenge)
7. Though I have poor self-esteem, I am quite straight forward and outspoken person (I can't harbor a grudge for a long time instead I"ll vent it out)
   
8. I can counteract an opposition without hurting others(courtesy: my sense of humor)
   
9. God has blessed me with a good skin ( I never had pimples, touch wood)
10. I have relatively good linguistic skills and can write well to an extent
11. I have got such a sweet voice
12. I believe in equality to all in particular, equality to women.
13. I will never get angry immediately (except with my sister and father) and will give enough chances to others.
14. I am very honest and faithful person
15. I have a willingness to help others to an extent ( but can say a big "no" to people those who try to take a ride on me)

Minuses

1. I am very indecisive.I can't take quick decisions
2. I am very lazy and will not do work that doesn't interest me
3. If I get angry, I will throw tantrums and shout at others(this happens with my dad,uncle and sister)
4. I am quite unorganized and clumsy
5. I have quite low self-esteem and at times, stammer while talking with elders or superiors
6. I am either too positive, enthusiastic and full of life or too negative and lifeless.No stability
7. If I get bad experience with some situation, I will get demotivated and lose interest in that.(for instance, I lost my camera mobile, I totally lost interest for mobiles)
8. I can be very playful at times
9. I am very impatient
10. I have very thin hair
11. I am quite short
12. I am very kiddish. I will expect appreciation and approval from others for every small thing
13. I can be over sensitive and touchy at times in particular, in my personal life

So this brings me to the end of this list for a while. Of course, this list is open for my friends and well-wishers to add or delete some points from both the sides. In fact, I request people those who know me better to comment on this so that I can work on it.

How I evolved to be what I am now?

As a kid, i have always been spanking and hyper-active. My mother had a very tough time tackling a naughty me, just like all other mothers. But with the turn of events, it was only during my schooling , I became docile and introverted. I developed a kind of low self esteem and estranged myself from the main stream. It is evident even from the video and photo records of my young age that I always look for a hideout to stay out of focus. I will always seek the security of a crowd who share similar low self-esteem traits just like me wherever I go. The breeding ground for my negative thoughts about myself is definitely not my mind. I was neither born with the thought that I am unfit nor I had the maturity to decide my self-worth. It was cultivated only in my school days.

The education system in those days determined the worth of a student only by the grades that he or she gets. I was not an outstanding student. But I had my own innate and unseen talents. I was a sure dunce at Maths and related subjects. But was a good student in English and other creative subjects. On the home front, everything ended up with a comparison. My mother had to maintain a facade of normalcy for inquiries about my studies, school or health. It further added up to my negative feeling. It was only when I reached my eleventh standard that I realized the real-achiever sleeping deep inside me.It was the moment of freedom for my poor mother who had struggled with me since she had put me into that "much coveted school". I passed out twelfth standard with a better percentage and was admitted into the city's one of the best colleges.

It was only in my college that I found a new me. I won prizes in writing competition, internship presentations and much more. It was only at that moment that I decided that my life will be associated with writing. Later, for the first time in my life, I chose a specialization of my choice in my post graduation after a long battle . My first decision paved way to the subsequent independent decisions as regard to career, job and hopefully marriage. Though I don't lead an outstanding and successful life, I have evolved to be a better person than what I was. I humbly pass all the credits to my mom, who against all odds in a joint family set-up, brought me up as what I am now.I am looking forward to find more newer dimensions of myself and become a much better person.